Why adults have extramarital affairs?
Chat about a loaded subject that no one wants to talk about, this is it. Amusing thing, affairs have been going on from old ages. Extramarital relationships can be loaded with problems, cause heartache, and other problems. In addition you should wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety issue, funds, age dissimilarity, religious education, shame, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this post I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, dating for married.
Why do people have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are men seeking affairs. I think mostly though it is only the human nature, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
Biologically we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is enjoyable and fun, and sex makes us get away the real world for a small period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people can switch the longing on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another being, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos humanity has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of individuals the yearnings will defeat their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their family, but society too. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is awfully pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not wound your relatives or anyone else? You will need to minimize the jeopardy you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is advantageous to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the largest grouping, enormous truly. There are many couples whose marriage is over, apart from they feel comfortable in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to consider. Your assets are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live as a family besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that prevent them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their spouse. An marital affair at times solves the trouble while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Ignoring, sorrowfully this is a regular groung I fear. One or the other, usually the man is sexually neglecting his lady for a tones of reasons. As a man I really am thankful to you guys neglecting your girls and making them accessible to us males of romance, making them “milf wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply developed distantly, our relulas interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposite of what you want. Maybe I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they look for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for financial gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.